There are lots of different kind of sauces. In many regions of the country, the sweeter molasses based sauces seem to dominate, but there are many options.
One brand of sauces you might want to check out is Lillie's Q sauces developed by Chef Charlie McKenna. He grew up in Greenville, SC which is within easy driving distance of some of the best BBQ regions of the country. He now operates BBQ restaurants in Chicago and Florida. He travelled the BBQ competition circuits and developed sauces based on each region in which the competitions were held. The restaurants and the sauces were named after his grandmother Lillie who taught him to appreciate fine southern BBQ.
There is a Eastern North Carolina thin, vinegar based sauce with mild heat from chili pepper, There is nothing sweet at all about that. I love it on pulled pork.
There is a Carolina BBQ sauce patterned after the slightly sweet ketchup based sauces of Western North Carolina.
There is a Carolina Gold sauce patterned after the mustard based sauces of South Carolina.
There is a Smoky sauce that is patterned after the Memphis style sweet sauce.
Then there is the Ivory sauce patterned after the famed Alabama White sauce developed in 1925 by Big Bob Gibson in Decatur, AL. It is a tangy mayonnaise based sauce, quite unlike most other sauces. The sauce is still used to this day for dipping BBQ chickens at the restaurant that bears in name and still run by family members. It is a very unique sauce that is wonderful on chicken, but useful on other meats as well.
There are other variants as well, including sugar-free varieties.
What I am trying to say, is that there is an entire country of BBQ sauces available outside the sticky-sweet molasses sauces. Like your wife, I do not like that type of sauce, either, but really like some of the others. You did not list where you live, so I do not know what might be readily available at your local grocery stores. I suspect you can find a store that stocks a wide variety of sauces. If you cannot find one you like, there are plenty recipes online for making each of the regional sauces listed. People tend to like the style of sauces that were common in the region in which they were raised. I grew up in Virginia, bordering the Carolinas, so I was exposed to a variety of different sauce styles. I find that I like most of them other than the KC style. I am having difficulty finding Eastern North Carolina vinegar based sauces in my local stores in the Chicago suburbs, so I will make my own.